happiness.

I'm such an indecisive person.

Every single little choice I have to make in my life drives me crazy. I'm constantly thinking of how one small decision will affect my future. Everything just kills me! And my mind is always moving a million miles an hour so I can't just lie down, close my eyes and think things through. I just want to be happy you know? School is killer because they're always trying to brainwash me into thinking that I will become a lonely someone working in a factory for one of my former classmates if I don't go out and get involved in every activity, club, and sport the school, community, state, and world offer!

I just wish I could be one of those careless people who went about life one day at a time. One who never thought about college or the future. But I know I'm not that person. I could never even imagine being like that. I just wish that's all. But be careful what you wish for...so never mind. I take it back.

I just have to stop worrying so much. And go with the flow. I mean nobody even remembers what achievements one had in high school anyway right? And so what if I don't get into an Ivy League college? I won't rot under a bridge. I know that no matter what I'm a committed person and that I will always work to achieve all my goals.

For now I'm just going to submerge myself in my favorite music and t.v. shows. I'm going to cover my walls with pictures of my favorite people and things. I'm going to sleep in until noon. I'm going to read every single book lying on my bookshelves whose pages have yet to be flipped through. I'm going to learn to drive and play the guitar. I'm going to be confident and stop comparing myself to others.

I'm going to try my best and just be happy (: